Saturday, December 10, 2005

Do Some Dance YAAR


I've been refraining from putting this post up for quite sometime now. But I just couldn't resist anymore. I mean what the fuck are all these northies doing in Bangalore? Not that I hate all of them really. They are all ok. Afterall, we're all Indian and all that jazz, but when did they take over the fucking city?

Everywhere I look, all I see are north Indians. The mangy's have all moved to the gelf. The malayalees are taking over Greenland I am sure. Those were the two danger breeds, but now that they've moved shop, north Indians are spreading. And fast.

There's something very personal to me about this city. I was born here for crying out loud. St. John's Hospital to be precise. I've lived here for almost all my life. Its just not fair when I see so many outsiders in my fucking city! I mean get the fuck out already. Goto Gurgaon and study or something. How about Chandigarh huh? Maybe join a call center there. Like we don't have enough talent going around to fill up the jobs here anyways. But no, you guys have to come here and make life difficult for my fellow Bangaloreans.

Take your MH, HA and other crappy registrations other than KA and drive back. We don't need you here. Sorry if I am being mean, but I am just frustrated man. I mean there used to be a time when bangalore used to rule. Not that many cars on the road, nice clean air, open roads, the works. For some odd reason, when I look back at it, ever since the call center boom happened and these truck load of northies landed up in the city, its just a downhill thing happening for us. They are making too much money, buying more cars, polluting the air, eating a lot, spoiling the roads and causing traffic jams.

Anyways, I think I lost it yesterday at a youth fest in the city. I was sitting by myself and there was some loud music and some fashion event happening. I was waiting for a friend who went to bring me chicken. There was this one dude, sure shot northie standing right next to me. For some odd reason, he kept screaming "Alliance rocks man". I swear those were his exact same words. Now if he did that once, it was fine with me. I wouldn't have been here blogging about NORTHIES in general. But he did it atleast 4 times.

Fucking piss off. I mean who the fuck cares if Alliance rocks. What the fuck is Alliance? Who the fuck really cares? Why scream more than once. Your voice is drowned by the god damm music anyways. Moreover, your pissing us bangaloreans off with that fucked up Northie accent. Ashooo, anger is came.

Go back to dilli. Go!! Just go!!

22 comments:

Tha Dalda said...

ROFL nice 1. sadly i have to agree with u on this one. we led a peaceful life without ny hassles and sudsuddenly these northies turn up from nowhere. mumbai ppl r tolerable. delhi ppl r rubbish. they dress up like garbage (not the band) with floral patterns on their shirts. they come here hopin that they end up with some chick in a disco where they dance like a telugu movie song sequence (sry watched a telugu movie durin trip to tirupathi). they end up here as these spas, despos and smelly ppl. biharis are worse. they keep spittin pan arnd every 5 sec and they speak only in hindi (damn fukkin kundi chappars). but the worst of the lot are the chinkie pinkies. they consider themselves as God's gift to discos. they come here, multiply like cockroaches n dance like gigolos. damn chappars. bongs r ok because they r guitarists n guitarists r cool.

Dr. Pissed said...

Asshoo, dalda is going to start a communal war.
DISCLAIMER: All opinions stated above are that of the author alone and share very little similiarity with that of the webmaster a.k.a the one - JOMINDER. Please feel free to kick dalda in the balls :)

Tha Dalda said...

at this moment, i have very good plans of uploading dr pissed's true identity with pics in my blog. remember d00d, we r in this together. both of us go down the same time. that also includes blufrog, ladyparadox, wally and dee iyer. so all get kundi beatings if i do. u cant help it.

silverine said...

LOL at dalda's last comment :))

I agree with you cent percent on this. Though their beligerence has cooled down a bit, now that they know that we Bangaloreans dont think we are blessed by their presence. I think I was one of the first to blog about this.Click on the link to read my take on this.

The other day at a movie at Rex, there was this crowd of Northies who were passing obscene comments loudly. No one in the theater had the balls to tell them to f*** off. Then an elderly gentleman went and called the usher, who told them to shut up.

I miss good old Bangalore and the genteel way of life.

jax said...

Dude, you'll love the Bangalore Torpedo!
Read this post.

Broken Verses said...

okay so it's official now.

Am sooo NOT comin to B'lore.

EVER

It's better to stay in my Dilli and be a northie.

ps: wud u mind cleaning off all the irritating mallu's or watever southies we have in this part o the world? Crazy fellos all o them..with all their freaky oiled hair and coconuts. Take'em where they belong.

Alice said...

That's Alliance Business Academy.. I believe it's pretty good. Very far. But pretty good.

Bluefrogtribute said...

hmmmmmmm. i see this was sparked by our conversation at pecos, yes dalda blufrog should get his ass kicked why not. PS i am bluefrog, yes the northies ya they suck thats pretty much it. Bangalore has changed like crazy man auto drivers talk to me in hindi and i goehhhhhhh wat the fuck is wrong with them. THere is night time restrictions thanks to them. Bars re expensive. more cops on the road crime and shit, Broken verses u aint welcome man, ure problem to get rid of the southies from ure place. we might put oil in our head but we dont act like monkeys out of our cage all the time.Anyways i am in no mood for civil wars all i say is if u frecking come here dont spoil it.

Wally said...

Bangalore happens to be great just becuz of its tolerance of other cultures and people. The problem is that for every decent mull, mangi or dilli-ite we get saddled with 5-6 more pieces of trash.

Thats whats cloggin up the city honestly. We should start giving visas out to people who come to bangalore.

Namrata said...

Excue me... but your ex girlfriend is a northie Mr. Pissed. :)

ladyparadox said...

let us southies unite and kick the northies out. at least we tolerate their annoying antics and put up with them. hell, we even help them out! when we go there, the louday nan magas treat us like we crawled out from under something. now angry is came for me also. hmmm.... inner peace wanted...

dee iyer said...

i like northies.. what you are all saying ?
I am a tam bram .. who thinks that all the good looks and nice food comes from there..
not brains though . thats south dept ...
P.S Sorry if politically incorrect statements hurt anyone , k ?

silverine said...

@broken verses

"with all their freaky oiled hair and coconuts"

It is this attitude is what we southies do not like. You will never hear such drerogatory comments from southies to describe the northies. It is only offlate that after being the butt of your derision that the southies have began retaliating.It was your people who cast the first stone please remember!

Do you ever see the southies in the North acting boorish like your people do here?

Maybe you are not that kind of person, but most your ilk here in Bangalore are extremely insufferable.There is no smoke without a fire. So also, the anti northie feelings have their origins in the northie attitudes. Click on my name and read the post that I wrote. Every word written there is true and this incident really did happen!!!

.m. said...

ROTFL @ tha dalda...

have heard so much about the northie/southie debates.

isnt it cool tho tht Bangalore happens to be the melting pot of the tolerable, rubbish, chinkie pinkies, the guitarists and spitting??? Am so looking forward to visiting Bangalore!

Anonymous said...

and i dont like anybody very much...what do i do? hate the northies-fuckin loud bastards! hate the southies-bloody thair sadam holier than anyone all the time! fuckin north easterns..too good for anyone..bongs--bloody insane if you ask me--gujjus--cant see beyond their arses...dont like ANYBODY...UH NO!!

Loonie said...

JUST KILL THEM!NO QUESTIONS ASKED! KILL THEM ALL!

KISHAN said...

LOL!!man U are all 100% right!!!! all freaked out kya be? bakra northie prokhies have started comin here!!!!!! Lol bluefrog and i saw this 4 member gay gang full of northies! all major hair coluring, nail polish and full on make up LOL! they freakin chew paaaaaaannnnn and spit on the road like no mans business and they fart in public! and worse the whole reason why bangalore is suffering this 11 o clock lame asss time curfew is because of these northie bliming dance bar gals and owners, we must start a nazzii movement aiming at the abolishin of all the northies! and if possible the freakin Chinky bilie jirleys!! man its like they are cock eyed ! oh and pl dont let me started bout the northie dressing sense!!! Wat kinda jeans do they wear man????? Zebra coloured jeans with pink Glossy T shirts hehe, Even the Porkhie NMKRV gals have better dressing sense than those stupid zebra heads!! Oh and bout "oily hair" hmmm? wat can i say? Those freakin idots have ads of the gay ass Shaahid adverising for shampoo using a BALD man, who? yes sivamani!1 who is southie, man these northies are takin over bangalore maybe we all should just kill em all, i d suggest just lettin em loose in chickpet they ll surely get into trouble n die.But it is good if we could use em as guinea pigs though!!!!!
hehe I hate animal testin and this is a perfect solution! Hehe make use of the worst!


courtesy kishan

unrest_cure said...

a freind who's from banglaore and working in delhi was reading you blog.

and being a stinkin northie who loves poking his ass in other people's business, just had to check out what the hell was she reading.

Honestly man, i completely agree with you,only that i feel the same about madrasis (in case you didn't know that's everyone living south of maharashtra).so many of them here, in bright green and fuschia outfits and seedy looks.

freaking buggers with horrible accents and a knack for finding out what village you're from, every time some one mentions that they're from a place a zillion km away from Bangalore, but cozily nested in the south.

get a hobby, like collecting ants or may be inventing new ways to commit suicide and die and in the process.

The Bangalore Torpedo said...

Unrest Cure. Hm. Apart from attitude adjustment ,reality recalibration and probably a bath you also need to learn how to spell .In case you still havent got the message , its the uncouth from the unsouth who are sadly thronging our midst we got a problem with. Good chaps like you, sitting as you probably are ,in south ex or Amar colony , may your tribe increase (preferably with replenishments from these parts.) Jai Hind.

Deppe said...

ROTFL @ 'uncouth from the unsouth'

Vikram said...

Good fury man...:)

I'm from Bangalore too and have spent almost all my life there except for the past two years. When I made a trip to Bangalore last summer, I was shocked to see the increase in the number of vehicles, the alarming pollution and total indiscipline. People hardly converse in Kannada anymore.

Overman said...

Kill 'em ell ...
The northies ..the southies ...the bongs ( not if you can smoke some nice chronic using 'em ) , the north eastern's , the westerns , the south westerns ,the south eastern's , the west eastern's and what not ..we need ANARCHY ...
I got free bandwidth for just 1K a month ..