Monday, November 28, 2005

I NO HEART BUFFALO



I really lough farm animals I say. I mean. Not in a "pink" kind of way, but generally. I've always loved going to our ancestral home in Mangalore. Its fun.

But I've never really liked the buffalos though. Reasons:
1. They are always of just one color. Not like them cows. - no spots = no lough
2. They have absolutely no self defense. Sure, they are strong and all and can take down a lion and all that crap, but why would God be so mean and curve its horns inward? I mean what the fuck no?
3. It generally looks kinda stupid.

Ok, I lied. I don't really hate them buffaloes. Never really thought about them that much though. Anyways, so back to my post. So there I was on this road. Believe it or not, there was this buffalo standing in the middle of a fucking traffic signal. I mean, where else in this world could this happen. The buffalo was waiting, just like any one of us for the lights to turn green so we could carry on to our ultimate destinations.

I don't know if its luck or whatever, but I got to stand right next to the buffalo's hind limbs. Its bad standing next to its hind limbs, let me tell you why. First of all, it could poop. Secondly, the smells bad. Anyways, waiting there, I least expected whatever happened next to happen.

I take off my helmet and I was just waiting for the signal to go green when suddenly the buffalo swings its tail man and gives me one chaapa on my face. I mean it didn't hurt and all, but what the fuck. I didn't know what had struck me and before I knew it, two chicks from the auto behind me were giggling. So was the fucking auto driver. I looked right, about 7 people waiting for a bus at the bus stand were also laughing. Ayoo, karma..

Lesson learned. Shoot the buffalo or throw helmet at buffalo at next signal!

Fucking piss off..

BTW, for all your Dr. Pissed fans, my next few posts are going to be the tags that have long been pending. So sorry if I goto disappoint a few of you, but I goto make a few others happee.

9 comments:

Anonymous said...

did u watch i heart huckabees kannee? nice kno, o u dint watcha... hoge kettu hudugi u r. 2 with u.

tag anthe, no manners onlee.

super maal buffalo.

Anonymous said...

a chaapa on the face. kill the animal. no questions asked, just kill it.

LadyParadox said...

eyyy!

what ya! hehehehe! what a fundoo buffalo! chappa only? it should have showered with blessings also. :P

i will report everyone to SPCA. then PETA also will come off. then pam anderson will run and come off baywatch style - with full ticking tits and all. then you boys can be happy. :)

Anonymous said...

pam anderson anthee thuu. live with the times da. no manners onlee.

Anonymous said...

First things first ... why did you stop right behind a buffalo? What did you expect to happen? Havent you seen enough to know better?

I think you deserved it. And like LP said, you should have got its blessings too ...

Angel said...

doc, the comments you get are almost as entertaining as your posts...:P

Anonymous said...

dp, i have just one thing to say..
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAHHA!
yes, your misery is amusing to me! :D looking forward to more posts! jaldi!

silverine said...

You are the chosen one!!! hail dr pised! Of all the people on the road the Buffalo chose you to do a chappa on the face :)) lol sorry but I have to go ha ha ha ha

p.s. your posts always leave me smiling, please dont ever stop getting pissed :)

dee iyer said...

eeyyy. i missed all your negativity , da ..
how you been , friend ..
its been a long long time ..
no rasna ..
sorry..
Only formalities